"The family.  We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together."  Erma Bombeck

"A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. "  Jerry Seinfeld

"Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing."  Phyllis Diller, Phyllis Diller's Housekeeping Hints, 1966

"When you teach your son, you teach your son's son."  The Talmud

"Many a child is spoiled because you can't spank a Grandpa!"  Author Unknown

"Insanity is hereditary; you inherit it from your children."  Sam Levenson?